Topher and I have started going back and reading the Conference talks from this past Conference, and last night's was esp. neat.
We read the talk the President Monson gave in the Sunday morning session...and the last part of it really stuck out to both Topher and myself:
"Mortality is a time of testing, a time to prove ourselves worthy to
return the presence of our Heavenly Father. In order to be
tested, we must sometimes face challenges and difficulties. At times there
appears to be no light at the tunnel's end--no dawn to break the night's
darkness. We feel surrounded by the pain of broken hearts, the
disappointment of shattered dreams, and the despair of vanished hopes. We
join in uttering the biblical plea "Is there no balm in Gilead?" We are
inclined to view our own personal misfortunes through the distorted prism of
pessimism. We feel abandoned, heartbroken, alone. If you find
yourself in such a situation, I plead with you to turn to our Heavenly Father in
faith. He will lift you and guide you. He will not always take your
afflictions from you, but He will comfort and lead you with love through
whatever storm you face."
I think that was so good for us to read with each other. It renewed our faith, possibly which may have been slightly dwindling. As of late, we, (well, pretty much me, Alysia) have felt slightly frustrated. Frustrated that so many children and families, can be faced with such difficult trials. Frustrated that it seems sometimes as though we are never 'out of the woods'. There is always another problem around the corner, and I have found myself wondering, 'Isn't it enough yet'? 'Havent' we already gone through enough'? And I haven't felt this even so much regarding our situation, but more so looking at other families. It just doesn't seem fair that they are faced with problem after problem, and that as soon as all seems to be heading in the right direction, there is another bump in the road, another trial to overcome. And last night especially, I had my first feelings of resentment, where I was almost angry. Because it just doesn't seem fair for these sweet spirits to go through so much, only to have something else thrown at them each time they overcome their latest difficulty.
But, with a great sigh, I am realizing more fully that these are trials each little child and family has to go through. This is a trial Grace, and we as a little family, have to go through. And although we don't see the light at the end of the tunnel, and we don't know what the outcome will be, we know that Heavenly Father is watching over us, waiting to comfort us if we will but let him. We know that Heavenly Father will guide us through this "storm" and that we will someday, be able to look into his eyes, knowing that this trial was for our good, and that he never once left us alone. We just have to keep the faith. Knowing that all will be well, whether now or later, all will be for our good, and all will repair itself in the eternities.
Thanks for letting me vent for a little bit. And I hope that President Monson's thought was as helpful to you as it was to me. :)
7 comments:
It seems there are always 2 options, when faced with trials. We can turn away, like Job's wife, who said: Why don't you curse God and die. Or we can turn to God. I have always found thant things tend to work out much better with the second option. It will still be hard and often painful, but all that pain and suffering will not be waisted, because we will be much better people in the end, and to top it all off, we will have gotten to know Heavenly Father a bit better and felt His love and concern for us, and seen how close to us He really does stay.
You two are awesome. Grace knew why she picked you for her parents. All my love, Mum
What a great post..I think I was inspired to look at your blog tonight because I needed to read that. It does seem so unfair for these innocent babies to go thru all this and it gets very frusterating. Your words are my feelings exactly right now. I always have to remind myself that this is all for a reason that I don't understand quite yet.
Knowing others are out there gonig thru all of this too is comforting. Thanks for helping me out tonight...
We're glad that Grace is doing so well! She is so adorable... We always check up on her to see how she's doing. These babies are truly incredible.. We're praying for you and your sweet girl.
Avery Milne
Thanks for sharing that Bug. I vaguely remember him saying that, but I hadn't thought of it in this context. The Prophet is truly an inspired man.
I appreciate your thoughts, Buggy. It is so easy to see the apparent inequity in things around us - and especially in things that are so personal to us sometimes - and it, rightly or wrongly, often confuses or frustrates us - and we question and wonder....and can become angry or resentful. I think I can understand, to some extent, that process and also recognize I, no doubt, have been a part of other people going through that same process.
I think I would also say that it is one thing to recognize what we need to do and how we should act/react....and even to gain the perspective that can be so helpful in any situation where adversity, challenges, trials and the like are upon us - but it is quite another thing to then let that realization and recognition truly influence us and motivate us to consistently act accordingly. Perhaps that is where the element of faith and "turning to God" really comes into play. Without doing so we may have the academic or cerebral understanding of a situation, but not the internalization that really provides the power to act and be "healed"....and the ability to persevere and endure.
In any event, I appreciate what you have shared and want you to know how much we admire your resolve, your peace, your remarkable courage and your hanging in there. We love you - and hope we can also give you the continuing support that might - in some way - be helpful to you. I am certain that when we turn to the Lord in situations like this, he often sustains and helps through the hands of others - and specifically of those in a position to extend their hands for Him. You are in our prayers always.
I often find that the people who are going through the most are the ones that end up lifting the spirits of the rest of us who wonder why. That was good to hear again. We truly love you.
Alysia,
Your sweet words made me teary! This ordeal has really shown what you are made of. You are an exceptionally deep young lady with great character. Thank you so very much for marrying our Toph and coming into our family. You are going to be a wonderful asset through the years. You are so dang much fun to be around it is interesting to see your serious side. You are multi-faceted.
love,
Grandma Atkinson
Hi--I don't know you, but I went to high school with Jen. I wanted to let you know that you are NOT alone. We are stuggling with our 5 month old--he was perfectly healthy and at three months of age decided he couldn't breathe anymore. He is now home after 2.5 months in the hospital with a tracheostomy and a ventilator. We are also struggling with geting him to eat--we have the NG tube, etc. I just wanted to share something that helped me through living in the hospital with our son and not knowing what is going to happen to him: I was reading in the Book of Mormon one night and found this scripture: "And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even ye cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage, and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions." I know I don't know you, but I want to tell you that living in that hospital, the Lord fulfilled that promise to me. I know he will do it for you. Good luck to you!!!!!
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