9.26.2009

Sedation=Drunkeness

Before your imagination gets carried away, no, none of our household was drunk. At least not literally. But in a manner of speaking? Perhaps.
I mentioned that Grace had her Biopsy in late August. Although it went really well, Grace's Dr. (Dr. Everitt) said they wanted a more clear picture of her ascending aorta, because the gradients/pressures were shown to be a bit uneven. They weren't particularly worried, but just wanted to be safe. So we scheduled a sedated echo for a month after her Biopsy. That was just a couple of days ago and boy oh boy, it was quite a day.
When Grace goes in for a sedated echo, she has to be fed differently beforehand, so I set an alarm on my phone for the day before, so I would remember to feed her differently. But, setting it the day early proved to be too early, as I had forgotten by the time her evening meal rolled around and promptly fed her a bottle. Her echo was supposed to be at 8:30a.m, but since she had the bottle the night before, we couldn't do the 8:30 echo anymore. Which was a bummer, because it would have been much easier to not feed her the night before and all night long. She doesn't typically wake for midnight snacks. But, our rescheduled echo time was 2:30... now I'd have to keep her hungry all morning and afternoon. I knew it would put her in great spirits for the echo... starving and mad. I tried to postpone breakfast as long as possible, and made sure we ate the same thing, so she couldn't ask for something else. Raspberry Jell-o and apple juice isn't the best breakfast in the world. But, oh well.
We got to the Dr. at 1:30 and she was angelic. Completely the opposite of how she usually behaves for echos. She is always kicking and screaming and sprawling all over, but this time she was so good!! She insisted on holding her baby doll, and she would rub its head and give it kisses and tell people around her to "shhhh" because baby was asleep. She was so sweet.
For the first 15 minutes.
The doctors felt like she was pretty cooperative, but not "still" enough, so they figured they would try to just give her half of the sedation dose. Just the feel of the medicine going into her vein sent her over the edge. Strange, I know, but its true. How she doesn't love cold liquid streaming through her arm is beyond me. She didn't like that feeling one bit. So, they had to give her the full dose, plus a dissociative, (relaxant). I had to hold her in my arms because no one could restrain her little body on the bed as she kicked, screamed, arched her back and tried to roll away from everyone. Holding her little body in my arms as different parts lost complete control was so hard!! She was fighting me with every fiber of her being, but was slowly losing control of her head, and her eyelids, and so on. Poor thing, even once her eyes were closed and she couldn't lift her head anymore she was still pushing against me. It took her a good 10 minutes until we could put her back on the bed, and even then, she continued to whimper in her sleep, just to show she was still protesting.
They said that most babies will stay asleep for 2 hours, and not to wake them early, because they will be very very grumpy. Since Grace can so easily have a mean streak, I really didn't want her to wake up early. However, I also knew that if Grace had any say in the matter she'd wake up the second her eyes could open, whether the rest of her body was ready or not.
And that's just what she did. Exactly 45 minutes after they'd administered the sedatives, and only 2 minutes after finishing the echo, she started to wake up. Go figure they were moving her upstairs in a bed, so her floppily trying to sit up in the bed was NOT a good thing. She smacked her head into the side railing, then on the oximeter and was just all over the place. When we got to the post-op floor she was writhing in my arms, with no head strength mind you, and her eyes rolled back into her head, and moaning loudly. Of course, for comic relief, she was doing all of this verrrryyyyy sllllooooooowwwlyyyyy. Sort of like someone had hit the slo-mo button. I would ask her a question, and she would nod "yes", but when she lifted her head up, it would roll back and stay for a second, then she'd push it forward, and it would roll way forward onto her chest and be stuck there until I held it against my chest. So I decided to stop asking her questions.
They got her a warm blanket (they have these amazing blanket ovens) and put it over her, she immediately responded with "aahhhhhht" "aaahhhhhht". "Yes baby, its hot, huh?" Then another nod of the head, locked backwards, and then locked forward. "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhht". It was so hysterically adorable, and sad at the same time!
Even though her eyes were still practically closed, she wanted to get down from my lap and walk around. They warned me she would be VERY dizzy, uncoordinated and to watch her very closely. I underestimated their meaning. She had NO coordination WHAT SO EVER.
So, back on to my lap she went, complaining, and moaning the whole time.
She tried to drink a bottle of juice, but drooled a lot of it out. Also very funny. And finally was happy with oreos. Most of the filling ended up up her nose, because she couldn't use her hands. She had a big band aid on one from the labs they drew, and an i.v. in the other one, (which means the cardboard up her hand) and so she had no control of her hands and where they were putting the cookie. So, up her nose they went. But she was happy anyway.
When they said we could be discharged from post-op and head downstairs for clinic, Grace was completely awake, but still very loopy.
But she insisted on walking. Gratefully, Topher was with us by this point and could help her. But, she didn't want any help. She wanted to walk and dang it, she didn't want Dad's help. He would try to hold her hand, and she would shove his fingers away from hers, and begin to walk. She couldn't put one foot in front of the other without tripping over it, and couldn't walk even one step straight. She swayed this way and that, tripped over this foot and then the other one. Fell over, then tried to get up and fell back wards. Then cried for help, and started all over again. But she didn't lose her grip on the Oreos in her hand.
The rest of clinic had to be performed in the hallways of Cardiology because she was not about to sit on some hospital bed in a hospital room. She was done sitting. She wanted to be walking around putting on her best impersonation of a tipsy 18 month old. Everyone that saw her laughed hysterically. Her Doctor could barely get out a sentence before having to pause and just laugh at Grace's attempts to walk without tipping over.
When they sent us home they said she would need constant supervision, and that she would be grumpy and clumsy at least until the next morning.
She slept on the way home and another 40 minutes once we got home. When she woke up and I went in to get her out of bed, she was leaning her arms and head against the railing of her bed, crying. But, she was crying very slowly, and in a much lower tone than usual. It was crying in slow motion! Once she saw me, she gave me a crooked smile, reached her arms up for me.....and fell backwards into her bed.
I pulled her little body up, and took her into the living room, where she of course, just wanted down. I put her down......and she fell over into the movie case. So, I decided to just put her in her spot on the couch. I tucked her as far back as she goes, put pillows around her and put a movie on. In the time it took me to lean away from the couch and push play, she had tried to turn around and climb off the couch. Instead, she managed to fall off the couch and land on her back. So, I propped her up, between the couch, and the coffee table, while I went to push play again. This time.....she fell over side ways, hitting her head on the coffee table leg, AND the chaise. And since she never cried after any of her falls (she just looked very, very confused each time she fell), Topher and I didn't have to feel guilty for chuckling.... perhaps even laughing hysterically. each time she tipped over.
The poor thing had such a hard night. On top of the clumsiness she was also EXTREMELY grumpy. So, it was a good thing there were things to laugh at every once and a while, or we might have gone crazy with such a grump on our hands.
Anyway, I just had to post about this. As I've said before, this is a form of journaling for me, and I don't want to forget how hysterically cute she was that whole day.
I wish more than anything I had had my camera. Pictures wouldn't have done the day justice, but video for sure would have. But, alas, its still at my sister's. However, they said these sedated echos will be a twice a year occurrence...so next time, I am GOING to have my camera in hand, ready to capture my stubborn and tipsy Grace.

9.21.2009

Grace is 18 months old!

I know I haven't finished my California Dreamin' posts, however, I still can't find my camera cable, and now, to further the situation, I've left my camera at my sister's house. So, it may be a while before my trip diaries are completed.
But, since this is a form of journaling for me, I couldn't let another day go by without mentioning that my baby is 18 months old!! On the 18th, actually. So, I'm a little late. But, that's nothing of a surprise.
Grace never ceases to amaze me. She is constantly growing and changing, and very slowly, she is turning into a little toddler. I no longer feel like I can call her my baby. Babies are not as active, energetic, affectionate, silly or stubborn. She has always had a strong personality. No one can dispute that. She has definitely had all the same characteristics since she was born, but she can express them much more now.

She is into EVERYTHING, and I don't even try to keep up with her anymore. She makes messes faster than I even find them. Such as this morning, she found my food coloring. Let me just say that the cupboard the food coloring was in, was supposed to be baby proofed. She found a way around that. Found a way to get the lid off the food coloring and proceeded to turn her face green. Only once I saw her did I also see that she'd emptied out all my pancake mix onto the floor, the nesquik mix, the plastic cups, (now placed strategically AND individually all over the kitchen floor), the cereal, and the crackers. Along with everything being on the floor, she also had a handful of said foods in each hand, and lumps in each cheek.
What joy.
Honestly though, I wish I could have put on a straight face and scolded her, just so she'd know I meant business. But all I could do was laugh. So I turned and walked away so she wouldn't see me laughing hysterically at her mischief.
When I came back she had a look of such elation. Grinning from ear to ear, but at the same time, pausing every couple seconds to look at me for confirmation that she wasn't in trouble.
See, that is why I can't call her my baby anymore. Babies don't make that much of a mess!! Only toddlers on their way to being terrible twos.
Some other new things Grace is learning, is how to spin in a circle when she dances. She has always loved dancing, shaking her hips and such, but the spinning in a circle is definitely a new acheivement. Of course, I should mention she gets thrown off balance before a whole rotation and usually runs into an adjacent wall or falls down. But it is adorable to watch none the less.

She also has started trying very hard to take care of her baby dolls. She rocks them, puts blankets on them, tells us "shhh", becuse they're sleeping, and carries them all over the house. She also is trying not to bite their fingers and toes as much anymore, (I think this is because she bit her cousin Ellie's toes the other day, and Ellie didn't like it so much).
She wants to watch movies, ALL THE TIME. It used to be that when we got her up in the mornings, she wouldn't leave us alone until she was fed. She would grab our faces, pull them towards her and tell us hungry in sign language REPEATEDLY until we got out of bed and to the kitchen.
Now, she gets in bed with us and yells "Wa! Wa! Wa!" (To mean Watch of course) We tell her to pick out a movie, and she brings us one, exclaiming again "Wa! Wa!" We of course like to repeat this sequence a few times, to give ourselves a few more minutes to snooze while she is putting one movie back and picking a new one. But she is constantly wanting to watch movies. Yes, sadly, she may be becoming a couch potato. Although, she only watches any given movie a maximum of 15 minutes, then she wants a different one, or some food.
She hugs, kisses, tickles and blows raspberries on EVERY BABY SHE SEES. And this includes PICTURES of babies. It's a bit awkward when I don't even KNOW the victim of a baby, or their parental units, and I then have to apologize for my daughter's over excessive display of affection.
One thing that has completely changed is her favorite food. That's not to say she doesn't still like oreos, cheese and berries. However, none of these match up to Bananas. She can down an entire 'nana' in about 5 minutes. With oreos, she has discovered how to twist them to separate top from bottom, and she now just licks out the cream filling. Smart girl that Gracey. I didn't even teach her how to do that!!

Anyway. That is my girl. She is adorable. And a large majority of the time, she is a big pain in the pants. But I love her to pieces. Sometimes I feel like all I'm doing is feeding her, giving her a place to sleep and changing her diapers. But then she does little things, without being prompted, to show me that I might just be teaching her some things. Like wanting to say prayers at night, listening to her primary lullabys, saying please, thank you, and sorry, giving hugs and kisses to people that come or go, and sometimes just knowing when I need her to calm down and just let me hold her. Those are the moments I can console myself with thinking that maybe, just maybe I'm doing a few things right.

Anyway. Thanks for reading! Grace is growing fast into a healthy, strong, beautiful, and happy little daughter of God and we are so thankful for her and the time we've been blessed to have with her. Thanks for checking in on us and for all the love and support!
By the way, my apologies for all the pictures being so out dated. Once I get my camera back, and the right cable, I'll be sure to post plenty of pictures of our beautiful girl. She has definitely changed a lot!