2.05.2009

Failed New Years Resolution #1

Writing a blog on a weekly basis......FAILED

But don't say I didn't try....its my blasted computer that has cut me off at each attempt..(so what if there were only 2 attempts).
All in all, over the past month and a half a lot has happened, and yet at the same time, nothing has changed.
Grace continues in her up and down ways of eating, not eating, gorging, starving, gain 1/2 
pound, lose 1/2 a pound.  She is just a one woman roller coaster with her eating habits.
She was getting a G Tube, then she wasn't, she was eating like crazy, gaining weight...then she ate nearly nothing for 3 days.
Grace just loves to keep everyone guessing.  "Will she have any milk today?  Will she spit all her food out at me and clench her
 face til' it turns purple again?  Will I lose it and
 throw diced peaches at her?  Will she eat anything at all?"
And every day, the answer is a little bit different than the day before.  Some days better, some days worse, but never the same.
She needs to be eating FORMULA 5-6 times a day, 5 oz. each time. She eats 2 oz. 5-6 times a day.  She needs to be eating 3-4 oz. BABY FOOD 3-4 times a day.  She eats 2 oz. MAYBE twice a day.
She doesn't have a scheduled G-Tube Appt. as of yet, but it is very likely to take place in the next couple of weeks.  Topher and I have fought it for the past few months, because we have seen Grace eat like this and then very gradually, she's eating the full amount she needs, and gaining weight.  But this time there is no progress whatsoever.  She is just at a stand still and sometimes she's only going backwards.
Also, Grace has her annual biopsy coming up next weekend.  Hopefully there won't be any rejection like last time, and we can stay off of Lock-Down/House-Arrest.
There you have yourself a medical and dietary update.
Off the stressful, and somewhat boring topic of Grace's eating habits...In every other area she is doing amazingly well.  She continues to excel in every way developmentally.  She has been crawling for almost 2 weeks now.  Pulling herself up on everything to stand for about 2 months.  And just as of a couple days ago, she can actually stand without holding on to anyone/thing.  Note that she doesn't necessarily do this willingly.  In fact, it scares the squeals outta her.  But, she can do it!  We find her sitting and standing up in her crib constantly.  Also, she still says Mama, Dada and numerous other gibberish words.  But she most definitely knows what those first two mean.
She can also say "please" in sign language.  And wave hello and bye.  It is so much fun to see her learn new things, make new faces, or sounds.  
I feel like I'm starting to enjoy motherhood.  Its a wonderful feeling.
Grace is no less high maintenance however.
  She cries if you are more that 1 ft. away from her,a and even then sometimes cries until she is on your lap, with your full attention, and toys.  She screams and hyperventilates if you leave the room.  Refuses to crawl after you, even though she can, because
 she knows she can be picked up if she says "please" (darn those beautiful blue eyes).  Covers her mouth when you offer her food.  Shoves bottles away, and grabs for YOUR cup, then proceeds to "drink"  3/4 of it down her shirt. HUGHPH.  
She is a handful.
  And I whine and complain constantly.  All of our family and friends undoubtedly have some serious doubts about my mothering skills...and esp. about my maternal instincts.  So do I sometimes.  Sometimes I think that if Heavenly Father didn't know me better than anyone else does, he'd probably think I couldn't stand my daughter.  But luckily, he knows my mind, and my heart...and knows there's nothing in the world that I love like my Gracelyn.  
She is spunky, fun, entertaining, playful, energetic, curious, smart, and sometimes when I am very very very lucky, she gives me split-second cuddles.  
Really, I've got it so so good.  I just need to remember that more often and be thankful for who she is. Even if it's not what I had expected, that is ok, because I never could have dreamed up someone so wonderful anyway.  She is her own person, and I need to love her for it more, and complain about it less.  She is our little angel with a BIG attitude and we love her to pieces.  No really, I do.  I love my daughter more than I could possibly, ever explain.  I really do.  But that doesn't mean she can't drive me nuts every once and a while. ;)
So anyway...life is good.  
Grace is growing way too fast.  Not eating anywhere near enough, but we are A.O.K.
Topher is still going to school, working hard.  
I started taking a couple of night classes also...and I'm hardly working.  hehe. ok I'm enjoying myself also.
We've had some fun birthdays this last month or so.  




Happy Birthday to My AMAZING husband just a couple days ago, and also to the lovely Misty, my sister-in-law whose Birthday is the same day.
We also welcomed Misty's new baby, and our new niece, Almaya.  
She is beautiful and oh so sweet.  But something about these Andersen grand babies...they don't like to eat.  Please pray for little Maya's appetite! 
And Happy late Birthday to Daddy, Rachel, and Anya!
We love you all!  
p.s. I had some videos where Grace is just being cute and making faces...but they were too big for blogger to upload.  So i will edit them and upload them tomorrow... for now....goodnight.  :)

10 comments:

Gina and the Gang said...

So great to see new pics and new developments. Your thoughts remind me a lot of myself when Casey was that age. Torn between being so scared and thankful to have every second with him, yet falling into "normalcy" every now and then and getting frustrated just like a normal mom! Congratulations...you are learning to relax as a mom!

princess jen said...

Yay for the update and the cute new photos! Good luck with the g-tube and biopsy. I hope you have a fun weekend with your mami!

Bev said...

Your mothering amazes me. Being a mom is HARD in normal circumstances but you have an extraordinary one so I can't imagine. I think as mothers we all doubt ourselves. But I think you are a great mom and Grace is so dang cute thanks for sharing her with us.

The Simmons Family said...

It's so great to see an update!! I get frustrated right there with you... especially when they're on their eating rollercoaster!

Gracie looks fabulous! Good luck with the G-Tube and the upcoming biopsy. We're praying for NO rejection!

Andrea

Super Daysh said...

Ya, I agree..stop the complaining already! ;) She is such a cutie and we love your little Gracey-lou too! I'm glad that things are going well and that you haven't failed your night classes yet. tee hee hee.

Avery said...

Oh my gosh.. Her eating is exactly like Bela's!! I am trying my hardest not to GO CRAZY with it but most days I fail miserably... I would LOVE to talk to you about what you're doing with her and your g-tube plans if you wouldn't mind.. Today I've really been frusterated with it and I've just really wanted to talk to someone going through the same thing and happened to sit down and read your blog... Would you mind emailing me your number and I'll call you? it's averymilne@yahoo.com...

Amy Finnegan {BookshopTalk.com} said...

SO CUTE!!! I've missed seeing new pics of Gracey so much!!

The videos are great, too!! Thanks for sharing, and for updating us on everything else as well.

We'll be praying for her to eat more consistently and for her biopsy next week.

Love you all!

Alyssa said...

Hey Alysia! I'm glad to haer that things are going well! Jake, Jentry and I loved Grace's faces :) Happy birthday on the 25th of this month! Hope to see you in church soon. :)

Anonymous said...

i wouldn't worry about the Andersen babys eating because as you can tell (Topher) we pick it up later. :)

Thoughtful Runner said...

Would it be safe to say there is seldom a dull moment?? We certainly don't envy you - but really do admire you and all you do. We also love you and our little Grace....and are just grateful for all she brings to our family. Love you!